Dance of the Immortals
by MisstressFanGirl
Summary: What happens when a little author decides to play with a camera and some of the most beloved immortals? How about when Viktor and Lucian turn out to be alive, and... Singing?


Author's Note: Hehe, just one of the interesting little ideas I came up with one day in the middle of class, tell me what you think. I don't own any anime, movie, or game. Please put up with my half-ass attempt at trying to be a documented. Peoples may be a bit out of character, but oh well!

:: The camera focuses, as the scene before us is one of Selene on top of Michael after she throws him down on the bed. It appears that they are getting into some serious making out action. By the angle of the camera, you can guess that the couple is being spied on from behind a couch::

"Now," I whisper, "It appears that the vampire female is the dominant one of the couple. Oo, and I'd like to remind you all, I am _not_ a trained professional, this is an amateur… video… documentary thingie that I'm doing out of boredom. So yeah, attempted if you want, but ya might end up dead, like me!"

I start to freak out as Selene turns from her place on top of her man and look directly at me, stating plainly,

"You do know that I can hear you, right?"

"Me too!" Michael says before Selene glances at him, and he shuts up. Dude, he is so pussy whipped.

I stay silent for a moment before whispering,

"Maybe if I stay quiet, the cranky shella will go back ta mating." I use a horrible Australian ascent, grinning at the thought of the crocodile hunter getting his arm bit off.

"Might I suggest you LEAVE before I decide to have a little midnight snack."

"Selene, don'-"

"Shut up Michael."

"Okay…"

For a moment I try to figure out a plan of action of how to get my ass out of here alive. I can only come up with one…

"Hey, look, a unicorn!!" I yell, pointing the opposite side of the room of the door, and am amazed by the fact that the vampire-lady actually looks in the direction I look. Taking this chance, I make a mad dash for the door, make it out into the hall and sprint the way the front door is, dodging around confused vampires.

When I get about halfway from a turn, loud gun shots go off, and about this time I make a realization-

"Shit! Shit! I'm being shot at!!!"

I double my running speed, not bothering to catch much with the camera. I make it to the double stair main room and look down over the banister at the top of the heads of all the lounging vampires.

Standing on the banister, I yell,

"Oooooy!"

There, now I have their attention, and raising both my hands to the sky, I yell in an Arabian-accented voice,

"PRAISE ALAH!!"

Then, I jump off the banister, and sloppily land, falling over onto my but.

"Oooow… My butt-bone."

I manage to stand up and stumble out the front door, leaving the room full of immortals to be confused and such.

::A few hours has elapsed on the camera's timer, and our camera-girl is now having it point at her while she sips at a soda, sitting at a table inside a Taco Bell::

"So yeah, I did a little raffle with some paper, and it seems that our next destination is the sewers. It makes me wander why I even left my nice… safe… desk job of typing up Tactics of Evil. But oh well, one does need to get out and have experiences, right?"

I sigh and pick up the camera, taking my large soda -which I enriched with caffeine tablets- and head out to find a good place to enter the sewers, you know, a place that's not surrounded by any people.

After about half an hour of walking, I find such a place. The piss-yellow streetlights reveal no one to me, and I look down at the covered manhole, sipping at my watery soda and thinking of a way to get it open. Hmmm… Well, can't you get to the sewers by the subway systems?

Hah! It might not be the sewers, but I'm here. In a lonely, dark, dank part of the subway system tunnels. Luckily the camera has a flashlight thing on it! Ooo, lookit the dried blood on the floor. Looks like something was going… That… Way… Hmm, might as well fallow the trail!

I fallow the drips of blood, and there are more frequent cracks in the ground. Huh, the floor doesn't feel so stable her- Ohmygoditsadeadthing!!!

"Holy shit! It's a dead thing!" I yell as I see the trail of blood lead to a corpse of a… A… Werewolf? Wow. Nifty… It's all dead. I pull out my stick and poke the cadaver, it falls over, stiff, and rigemortous has set in.

Before I have much more time to poke, the ground beneath feet seems to shift, and I look down, realizing a bit to late that the floor is crumbling underneath me!

"Shiiiiiiiit!!" I yell all the way down, as I land on the rubble. For a moment I stay still, with my eyes closed, trying to figure out if my back as fallen apart.

"Hello…?" I snap my eyes open to see a room, which looks like a poorly taken care of bathroom, with its rotting tile. I find the only possible source of the voice to be a made, with shaggy brown hair and a beard, his face looks like all his veins were shot with dark blue dye. I giggle at the thought my mind produced.

"Its Jesus, l-o-l!!" I say, and laugh, rolling of onto my hands and push myself up. Now I recognize the dude, he's Lucian- leader of the Lycans, or as I like to call them, fuzzie-doggies!

Lucian raises an eyebrow and crossed his arms, waiting for an explanation. For a few moments we both sorta just stand there… Doing and saying nothing.

"Sooo…." I try to strike up conversation, "Aren't you suppose to be all… Deadish?"

"I guess. But I'm not."

"Ah… Well, I'm bored now, bye bye."

But before I make a quick escape, a sudden ruckus makes me turn back to see Lucian and the vampire elder dude Viktor engaged in a fight.

"Hey!" I yell, getting both their attentions, then point to Viktor and ask casually, "Aren't you suppose to be all, I dunno, _dead_?"

But before I get an answer, Lucian punches Viktor, and once again they are in a brawl. I sigh and deside that now is the best of times to test a theory I've had in my mind for a few months now. I take out a portable radio, and put in a cassette. A few seconds after I push play, the music begins to play, and I automatically recognize it at Soft Cell's Tainted Love.

At the first few pulses, both the two fighting immortals stop fighting, looking around at the air as if the music was a tangible thing, snapping their fingers to the pulses. The first of the words start up and both of them break out into symotaineous dance, singing along to the music.

I slowly back away from them, and out the door, capturing every second of the dance on videotape. Then, as I am out the threshold of the door, I turn and sprint down the hall, hearing the horribly sung lyrics all the way down the rubble of a hallway,

"_Tainted love! TAAAAINTED LOOVE!!_ "

Author's Note: Phew! That was close, and kinda disturbing. Do you have any idea how poor Lucian's and Viktor's singing skills are?! Well, anyway, I think I'll go back to doing something safer… Like typing up my Diablo fanfic. Bye bye for now!


End file.
